things i do

Aikido
Kyudo
Swimming
Japanese
Running
Staying in Shape
staying healthy
getting enough sleep
eating enough
doing pushups and situps
doing weights
meditating
the jplt
video games
movies
tv
saving money
doing shit every day
not being attached
supporting the non-japanese community
photography
cooking
laundry
cleaning my house
being a good teacher
being a good alt
learning how to teach english
teaching english
keeping a blog
friends elswhere in japan
friends in hita
friends at home
woodenfish program in Taiwan
woodenfish in Japan
girls
vegetarianism
cooking
cleaning
music
editing photos
achieving my goals
not achieving my goals
thinking
reading non fiction
reading fiction
reading japanese
japanese culture
culture shock
japanese buddhism
hita
thinking about the future (and not living in the present)
man... i would hate to be a foreigner living in japan.

Things this week

on sunday night, I went on a date. it didn't go well. It started out fine. But she apparently isn't comfortable around me. I mean, this has happened before. Like, she doesn't want to hang out alone with me. So, basically i invited Shane out. And, he well, stole the night away, to say the least.

on monday, there was the school festival. it was way cool the kids did a great job.

on tuesday, i went to get my drivers licence. I thought it didn't involve a drivers test. In fact, I called a number of times to confirm it didn't. But it did. And I failed. And now I have to go all the fuckin way back to oita to do it again. well at least the tester was nice.

on wednesday, two of mikumas students attended a speech contest in Oita. Unfortunately, one did not do so well, but the other did fantastic. I had been coaching her for about a month. I was so proud. I though... i knew she should win, and everyone i talked to agreed. But she didn't. Sonezaki sensei was one of the judges. And two other ALTs i don't know. Fantastic. Well at least Sonezaki knows i know how to do my job now. Also, the other teacher i went with was the teacher I had a bit of a crush on. Fucking cold as ice since i went on a date with her. You wanna go out again? Sure. How's this weekend? I'm busy I'll be at school all day. I mean at night... Yeah i'm busy... ugh

on thursday, not much happend. I was a little put off that the other teacher announced the results of the contest. Like she took credit for it. Obviously i'm over analyzing it, but i like to sweat the small stuff.

today, my boss offered to let me drive her car in preparation for the driving test. I did and then quickly proceeded to run it into a curb and fuck up the front left hubcap. I told her i'd pay for it. The tester at the center told me to mind the center line. well whatever i mean it was an honest mistake. I have no qualms about it other than i'm still worried about the test on tuesday. Which i may have to take fucking nenkyu for.

I also have to start thinking about what to do for christmas. Korea? Taiwan? Hong Kong? Home? Skiing?

I also have to start thinking about what to do next year. What i will do if i do something different. What I can do. What can I do? More fucking decisions.

Also its like the third day i've forgot to take my pillz. I was feeling pretty good earlier, but not so much at the moment.

Mom recommended that i get some Melatonin to help me sleep. I wonder where I can buy that here.

Finally, Its halloween. I forgot to do anything at school. I mean, i wasn't really interested in it, so whatever. But now i have to decide what to do tonight and this weekend. I was hoping to travel or something. Hmm... Ima throw on my haiqing and party it up at luchis it seems.

BURAINZU
Heisig Number 310ish

体育祭予行

This morning we had rehearsal for the taikusai/bunkasai at Mikuma (athletics/culture festival). I did nothing this whole morning practicall, but because I just had to be there, it was no problem. It's very strange, that when I am put in charge of my own time, I waste it and complain of boredom, but when I am doing something that's actually quite boring, its no problem. I just lazed around and talked with some kids listened to some japanese crap. I don't get it. If i was doing that little amount of producive work normally, I'd be going nuts like I usually am. getting all depressed and shite. WTF? I don't get myself. I'm too critical of myself. So i had a good morning! congratulations.　now sitting in my chair the feelings starting to slide away

Deadlines

In february, there is a "ALT意見交換会" - opinion exchange meeting that I was really hoping to go to. Unfortunately, the deadline for the application was Friday. Well, it needed to be at the prefectural office on Friday, so that they could sit on it for a week and send it off this friday. I mean, there's really no excuse on my part. The fucking Deadline was highlighed on the front of the application- i just somehow seemed to look that over. Acutally, at one point I thought that it was in fact last friday, but changed my mind when I saw it written in English. That is to say, one part of it had one date on it, and the other had another date... i mean it was fairly obvious what i was to do, but somehow the obvious didn't stick. well, i'll make the app anyway and see what happens.

Sunday

Last night, I went on a date. It was nice to go have dinner with someone. I haven't done that in a while. I gave a call up to Shane, he had wanted to go out earlier. apparently he was getting drunk on his lonesome back at the KR and needed some cigarettes, so I bought him a pack, as well as some hagen dasz cookies and cream.

we chatted it up over gin and tonics and the ice cream, and he basically encouraged me to get out on my scooter and see more of the country around hita. So, today I did. I brought my camera up on a route to Hikosan, and stopped to take pictures at iwaya jinja. Lovely weather. I like riding my scooter, even though at this point in time it is illegal for me to do so. there were a lot of curves on the road up the mountain, and i was practicing how to take them. I should buy that book about mororcycling that jeff suggested.

I also cut my hair this morning. I've normally been trying to do that every 2 weeks, as per FGS tradition, but this time i let it grow out for like four weeks. Longer than it had been in about a year. Ok.

Schedules

I've thought for a long time that to get my life in order I needed to create a schedule and stick to it. Since no one was telling me what to do anymore, I have to tell myself what to do. So today, i made a schedule of my week. Just this week. I hope i can make a schedule every week. maybe I will help me get my life on track.

Today

Today i wrote a letter to my professor in college. To some extent, he encouraged me to come on JET to japan. I feel that to some extent I am following in his footsteps. Actually, to a rather large extent. I mean, the JLPT, Kyudo, becoming a scholar-this guy is like a career role model. but my attachment to that model is doin' me bad. feeling like i NEED to pass nikyu. I SHOULD do kyudo, or some kind of martial art, as though I had promised. Its all in my head. Its all competition actually, Im competing with a ghost of who i think I should be. my ghost is always better than me. Why?

This is not a blog about my adventures. This is a blog about everyday life.

i think i want to get back on the blog horse. friends have recently encouraged me to keep a journal to stave of the boredom/loneliness that has recently plagued my life here. i plan to write about nothing in particular. my days what i do. i guess i do interesting things usually. mostly not. but i like to talk. maybe if i talk here, i can listen to other people better in the real world. also a blog doesn't judge. thats nice. maybe this is a good idea.